I realize why "worldly" people love the weekend so much. Spending it at the beach with your wife and dogs is the closest I felt to God.
Witness 007
JoinedPosts by Witness 007
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81
Pumpkins in the Kingdom Hall yard....now Christmas lights...you can too
by oompa ini have been a pretty serious practical joker my whole life....some say i am stuck in adolescence (i hope she is 17).
but anyway, right before halloween i took a couple of pumpkins too close to the road at a farmers place and put them in the kingdom hall front yard....i know i should have paid for them but no one was there.
it was sunday night, and was hoping maybe no one would notice till thursday meeting, but they were gone on wednesday.
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Witness 007
Ompa spraying the windows with snow = Vandalism. Which means you go to jail and get disfellowshiped for paganizing Jehovah's Temple. Also aren't there tresspassing laws in U.S.A? I'm starting a "Bail Ompa out of jail fund" I've put in $10 I hope we can get Johnny Cockran since he proved O.J didn't do it.
My idea is for all of us to send our "Dear Santa" letters to one Kingdom Hall...imagine the bags of mail they would get!
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JW say df/shunning is Scriptural...How do we get around those Scriptures?
by oompa inpaul of course is the mainstay of this, and i really like saying "hey lets stick to what jesus taught" but even he condemned the pharacees and others in a considerably judgemental manner.
so what to say to my elder/dad who won't speak to my df son?
like when paul says to not eat with them, don't say a greeting to them etc....how do we get around that?
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Witness 007
Peter dynied knowing the Son of God 3 times which is a sin against the Holy Spirit. He should have been disfellowshiped. Instead he was forgiven and became a Christian leader. Solomon turned Apostate with his wives but his books still made it in the Bible???!!!! W.T.F!!!!!! {My mum hates it when I argue this point.} Jesus associated with the sinners and scum of the earth and taught mercy and forgiveness for all....even healing/curing those who opposed him or did not become his followers.
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Have you ever seen anything strange in the sky?
by JH injust a while ago, i was looking at the clouds in the dark sky, and i saw a rotating pattern of lights, moving clockwise going left, then moving counter clockwise and moving right.
it did that for a while, going back and forth maybe 10 times.
about 100 lights made up this rotating pattern.
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Witness 007
I thought I saw Jesus ascending into the heavens but a white cloud caught him from view....it may have been a Boeing 737 they look a little like him.
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Post YOUR future Watchtower Qoutes 2050 and beyond!
by Witness 007 inwatchtower 2055 feb 1st "theodore jarcz the last member of the anionted died today when his robotic heart and kidneys gave out, he was 130 years old.".
watchtower 2060 feb 1st "the faithful great crowd class has through careful study found that "this generation" refers not to the annionted but to the "pepsi generation" who will not die out before armegedon.".
watchtower 2090 feb 1st "this generation refers to the robotic generation of 2040 which will not power down till the great tribulation arrives.".
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Witness 007
Watchtower 2089 Feb 1st "Millions now living will never die......due to bionic implants and technology. However for the "meek" or poor people who can't afford it, God's kingdom still offers everlasting life for Free!! Just spend hundreds of hours in field service, meetings, and study. {Legal disclaimer: Those you die during this time will have to wait till after Armegedon to be brought back to life. No refunds of hours or legal promises in writting are offered by the Watchtower Society Inc. Disfellowshiped people and Apostates need not apply}"
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Post YOUR future Watchtower Qoutes 2050 and beyond!
by Witness 007 inwatchtower 2055 feb 1st "theodore jarcz the last member of the anionted died today when his robotic heart and kidneys gave out, he was 130 years old.".
watchtower 2060 feb 1st "the faithful great crowd class has through careful study found that "this generation" refers not to the annionted but to the "pepsi generation" who will not die out before armegedon.".
watchtower 2090 feb 1st "this generation refers to the robotic generation of 2040 which will not power down till the great tribulation arrives.".
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Witness 007
Watchtower 2075 July 1st "Some may wonder why the memorial partakers has risen to 145,000. One Brother in Germany asked: "What the hell is going on?" We however rely on Jehovah, and realize that these are replacements for the replacement annionted who are unfaithful and lose faith. The other 1,000 are replacement, replacement, replacement annionted or spares as we call them at Bethel."
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Witness 007
I would not mind if she came with an off switch and volume remote control....the Watchtower would say that robot sex is not fornication since they have no soul...it would be masturbation.
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weird coincidences
by ninja inwe all know about the kennedy- lincoln coincidences...for those who dont...(all 2 of you) i will post it again .
strange coincidences between abraham lincoln and john f kennedy .
abraham lincoln was elected to congress in 1846. .
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Witness 007
That's enough to drive me mad.....and dont get me going on the number 23!!! First time I doubted the Truth 23, stopped pioneering 32 which is 23 reversed, stopped attending meetings 10/7/07 adds up to 23. Number of Brothers who said they missed me 23.....freakin 23!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Witness 007
Congrats! Buy me a beer mate?
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Post YOUR future Watchtower Qoutes 2050 and beyond!
by Witness 007 inwatchtower 2055 feb 1st "theodore jarcz the last member of the anionted died today when his robotic heart and kidneys gave out, he was 130 years old.".
watchtower 2060 feb 1st "the faithful great crowd class has through careful study found that "this generation" refers not to the annionted but to the "pepsi generation" who will not die out before armegedon.".
watchtower 2090 feb 1st "this generation refers to the robotic generation of 2040 which will not power down till the great tribulation arrives.".
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Witness 007
Watchtower 2050 Feb 1st "We find no biblical reason to ban Birthdays. We are really, really, really, sorry kids. Jehovah aprieciates your efforts.....also Gambling is not mentioned in the bible it is a conscience matter."